As per usual, when Taylor's new album dropped last week,
I had to have it. I've been a fan since her first album
and no matter how much I giggle at jokes people make about
how many boyfriends she's had - I still love her.
While driving home tonight, listening to "Red", something
popped into my head. Usually, when Taylor's
album comes out, there's always this "oh my gosh, Taylor
knows my life right now!" moment. And this time,
it hasn't happened.
And I love that.
There's no angsty Caitlin, trying to figure out why
he hasn't called or texted. There's no hardcore "I need break up"
Yes, I would love a relationship - and it's been hard
being single for as long as it's been..
but I'm not sitting around, waiting for something
to appear. For someone to appear.
But my mom said something that resonated with
me this past weekend - she said that there's a reason I'm single
right now, right where I'm at.
If I had a boyfriend, I wouldn't be focused on school
like I am. Or working three jobs (two in
the field I actually want to be in!)
I'd be distracted.
I told my friend Hannah what mom had said,
and she agreed. She said that I always put everything into
the things I'm passionate about - and I wouldn't
go around picking anyone, because
I wouldn't be passionate about them! Which
is 100% true.
I don't like to half-ass anything. And I don't
want to be in a relationship when it's
not right - that's just not me.
I don't like to pretend.
So, right now - I'm going to just listen to my
Taylor Swift cd - and enjoy it.
Enjoy the ups and downs - and listen to someone
elses heartbreak for a while. Because I need
a break - this year, it's all about me!